Well, it’s Friday. Another week of the summer down. Next weekend will by July 4th. June has gone by so very, very quickly and I’ve not gotten anything productive done.
I’ve cleaned the apartment a litte, gotten things straightened out there, I’ve “worked,” and gone home for a weekend. But my desk has two foot deep piles of stuff that I don’t know what needs to be done with it and I didn’t know what it was when I was unpacking the first time. Now I need to motivate myself to go through it and clean it off, so when school starts I’ll have as much desk real estate to fill as possible.
I just haven’t been able to motiviate myself to do anything besides sit here and read bulliten boards, IM with people (I don’t even do that a lot.), read comics, and do something. I can’t even remember what I did yesterday, but I didn’t sleep and I was sitting at my laptop presumably doing “something.” I just don’t know what I did.
Argh, I’m so very frustrated with myself right now. Plus, for some reason I can’t sleep when I need to, and I want to sleep when I shouldn’t be. Maybe I got myself back on the right sleep track last night…I’ve been awake all day today and I don’t think I’ll be napping when I go home after work. So maybe that problem is over, but that doesn’t explain the constant fatiguing. I know there’s nothing physically wrong with me, and I’ve been eating decently. I event bought frozen chicken breasts and have been eating those with corn and green beans.
So, wtf is up with me?
The last week has been so very annoying. Last weekend I went home and I had to make conscious decisions to be as nice as possible. I was fighting myself and forcing myself to take interest in people and things I normally love being around. This week, on the Lodge Room’s message board I’ve been very aggressive in my replies…not normal for me. I prefer to be playful and pointed…not a mean jackass that pisses people off before they see the point.
I’ve found that sitting and reading doesn’t work recently. I don’t have the patience to sit there…I used to be able to sit for hours upon hours and read. Now I’m just so…restless.
Sigh. I think I’ve typed enough for now. If you’ve got any ideas about what I’ve screwed up in my pysche or whatever, lemme know.
June 25th, 2004 at 3:36 pm
I know how you feel about productivity. By the time I get home after a long day at work, I want nothing more than to sit around and do nothing, even thought I have a list a mile long of stuff I want to do.
As far as the whole sleep thing, you’ll prolly think im insane, but try quitting caffiene. I did it at the end of the quarter and I think my mood, sleeping habits, and motivation all improved. Maybe thats just cause I was telling myself I was going to get better or maybe because I could see the end of the school year, but either way, it worked for me.
And also, post the gmail contest submissions!
June 26th, 2004 at 7:54 am
Luke, we must find you a woman
June 26th, 2004 at 7:52 pm
Bob’s one to talk unless somethings changed recently…..
June 26th, 2004 at 8:03 pm
Wrong Bob Midget.
June 28th, 2004 at 9:05 am
Yes, this Bob has no women issues